


The Great Skyhold Bake Off

by JustJasper



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - The Great British Bake Off Fusion, Baking, Cooking, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-05
Updated: 2017-01-05
Packaged: 2018-04-24 21:02:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 15,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4935259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustJasper/pseuds/JustJasper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Great Skyhold Bake Off (GSBO) is upon us again! This year a brand new batch of 12 contestants take to that iconic tent in the grounds of an Orlesian estate to bake their little hearts out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Week 1: Cake

**Author's Note:**

> **The Judges:** Morrigan and Lace Harding
> 
>  **The Presenters:** Isabela and Zevran
> 
>  **The Contestants:** Solas, Vivienne, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera, Varric, Cole, Cassandra, Blackwall, Leliana, Cullen and Josephine
> 
> I couldn't fit everyone in, so just imagine the rest of the Origins/DA2 crew as the film and production crew who get to eat all the food after the show is done filming. Or the spouses/families at home being supportive of their baker's constant practising.

Week one is cake week! Isabela and Zevran, on the back of complaints to the television regulation body over some of their jokes in the previous season, start out rather tame. A joke about buns here, a few waggled eyebrows there, but nothing to cause a fuss.

The judges are expecting great things from this season's contestants. It's traditional to start with cake on the Bake Off, but none of the challenges are easy, even if it's just week one.

**Signature Challenge: Chocolate Cake**

In the signature challenge, bakers show their tried-and-tested recipes. This week, the sponge must be chocolate, but bakers may flavour their cake however they see fit to compliment the chocolate.

Cole is sticking close to the brief, and making a chocolate cake with chocolate butter cream and chocolate icing, decorated with chocolate rabbits. He's literally just started and has flour splashed across his face. He's chatty, eager to talk to the other bakers, sometimes forgetting what he's doing in the process. Varric has to remind him not to let his sponges burn, managing to let Cole save them just in the knick of time.

*

“Chocolate,” Vivienne says, “is an art form. Though one wouldn't be surprised if there is a week dedicated to it when those with the most potential have been identified, there are still many skills to be showcased in this task.” She is making a chocolate and raspberry cake, with a tempered chocolate mirror glaze. She is calm and collected, and only allows the others to chat with her when she is on top her timings.

*

Blackwall also goes for a simple chocolate cake, flavoured with coffee. He doesn't seem very confident in his abilities, and it shows when he overloads on the coffee, burns his cake and cannot get his icing right. Sera, apparently taking pity on him, tells him how to at least make a decent chocolate icing to pipe and cover the burnt parts of his cake. It doesn't help all that much.

*

Despite spending the majority of the challenge time flirting with Zevran, Isabela and a disgruntled Dorian, Iron Bull still manages to produce a chocolate and orange cake with chocolate-dipped candied orange peel. His tank top says 'kiss the cook', and Isabela makes promises that if he wins, she will.

*

Solas makes a dark chocolate cake with lavender, citing an old Elven recipe. The judges are not convinced by chocolate and lavender, but Solas doesn't even deign to justify his choices. He was right, it seems, with a great balance of subtly flavours, though the judges thought the use of lavender in decoration was a little old fashioned.

*

Several of Sera's jokes about her cherry and chocolate cake can't be broadcast, though Isabela and Dorian find them hilarious. Her workbench is a mess, and she plays fast and loose with both recipes and timings, and her final product turns out a bit of a mess but tastes great.

*

The finish on Cullen's marbled chocolate cake doesn't set in time, and looks messy, and while the cake is under baked, it still tastes good. He follows his recipe to the letter, with no consideration for the new equipment he's using, which throws him off some.

*

The only contestant to make a tiered cake, Josephine goes all out with chocolate and raspberry and chocolate and cherry. She is pushed for time, and ends up rushing all her well planned decorations, leaving the cake looking unfinished. The amount of techniques she showed, and her flavours still impress the judges, and she's very helpful to the other contestants.

*

Dorian makes a white chocolate cake flavoured with chamomile and honey. He has rather a lot of fancy extras, and there's doubts about whether his flavours can deliver, but indeed they do. He seemed to expect more hostility from the other contestants, who were all quick to tease playfully, but wasn't turned from his plans for his cake.

*

Varric's chocolate and ginger cake looks good, but the flavours are a little weak. It doesn't seem to bother him, happy to relax and chat whilst cooking. Everyone likes his stories, apart from Cassandra, who seems disgusted by his flippant attitude to the challenge and their time constraints.

*

Leliana finishes her bake ten minutes before time, leaving her clearing her bench and chatting to the other contestants and Isabela and Zevran. The execution of her chocolate and hazelnut cake impresses judge Harding, as does her delicate decorative piping. Judge Morrigan is less impressed, deeming it too simple. Leliana seems unmoved by this criticism.

*

Cassandra's black forest gateaux inspired chocolate cake tastes good, and the look isn't very refined, but the judges are pleased, though Cassandra is disappointed because she believed she could do better. She seems as ready as Vivienne to really get down to the business of baking, but is more prone to being flustered by the goings on in the tent.

**Technical Challenge: Lemon And Rose Anderfell Battenberg Cake**

The technical challenge showcases a baker's skill under pressure, with no prior knowledge of the task they will be told to undertake. The recipe they are given offers only basic guidelines, and they must use their own knowledge and instinct to produce the best bake. This challenge is judged blind.

Cole's Battenberg is a bit of a mess, not even on the inside, but his icing and decoration is praised by the judges.

Cool under pressure, Vivienne and Dorian trade light-hearted insults from neighbouring workbenches. Her cake is, by judge Morrigan's rather surprised admission, almost technically perfect, flavoured wonderfully and decorated in a simple and elegant way.

Blackwall has never made a Battenberg cake before, so that puts him at a disadvantage when he has to guess what it's meant to be, whereas everyone else immediately knows the kind of classic appearance that will be desired of them.

Iron Bull shows off his strength by carrying Isabela and Zevran on his biceps. Despite that diversion, he still manages to produce a decent cake with good flavour, though the decoration is deemed too plain.

Solas talks to anyone who will listen about all the Battenbergs he's made, and all the interesting flavour combinations he's used in them. The judges deem his cake fair, though he skimped on the butter cream and he could have made the flavours stronger.

Sera spends the time her sponges are cooking mostly making fun of Solas to camera, and ends letting them burn slightly. Because she has to trim a lot away due to the burnt edges, her cake is a weird shape, and her icing has cracks in it.

Cullen's struggles with the lack on instructions, attesting that he's likes a good recipe to follow, and that baking is not an area where he likes to wing it. His sponge is too close, and the taste of rose is lost.

Josephine struggles with her timing, and loses lemon flavour in the sponge. Her decoration is unfinished because of time issues, and though the judges are impressed, they have to consider that it looks half-finished.

Dorian and Vivienne trade insults about Orlesian and Tevinter cooking in turn, and Dorian makes a clear effort not to swear on camera as he tries to figure out the stages of the recipe. He produces a good cake, with good flavour and pretty decoration.

Varric's cake is messy, untrimmed, and fully covered in icing. He also colours the icing rose pink despite no instruction to, but judge Harding is rather charmed by the effect, since it doesn't actually detract from the flavour.

Leliana's draws from her knowledge of other recipes, but she overestimates the amount of rose and lemon to use in her sponge batters. The lemon is tart but good, but her rose flavour is overpowering, and her cake is lopsided.

Cassandra finds the lack of instructions frustrating, but she perseveres and relies on her previous knowledge of baking to see her through, resulting in an excellent offering on the judging bench.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** _Blackwall, Varric, Leliana, Cullen, Sera, Josephine, Cole, Iron Bull, Solas, Dorian, Cassandra, Vivienne_

**Showstopper Challenge: 36 Miniature Cakes**

The showstopper round allows bakers to push themselves, show off their knowledge and skills, and impress the judges with how much they can achieve.

Cole's mini carrot cakes seem to continue his rabbit theme for the day, a fact he admits to readily when questioned by Isabela. She declares her intentions to adopt him to the tent at large, while Zevran says she might have to have joint custody with Varric. The judges are impressed by his cute fondant carrots that decorate the top of his cakes.

*

Vivienne decides that simplicity only works if executed without error. Her mini lemon chiffon cakes with crystal glaze wow the judges, who compliment the balance of sweet and tart, and the elegant display of them, and her attention to both flavour and presentation.

*

Blackwall makes mini sponge cakes with raspberries, and has trouble with his sponges not rising enough. They end up looking flatter than he intended, and the judges deem them over-simple, considering all the time the bakers had to make them in.

*

The judges aren't sure about Iron Bull's plans for mini banana and toffee cakes. Blackwall is caught on camera looking a little worried by all the rude banana puns Iron Bull and Sera are making. Despite their reservations, Bull impresses the judges with his flavour combination and execution. The sponge is a little heavy, but he says that's how he likes to make them.

*

Mini red velvet cakes are Solas' choice, and Sera finds herself the audience for a lecture on the proper way to make red velvet. Solas seems undeterred by her lack of interest. His cakes are praised for their taste and the process that went into making them.

*

Sera neglects her oven while flirting with Isabela. Her mini chocolate chip sponge cakes are slightly over-baked, but taste good, and judge Harding praises her colourful sweet-covered decoration, while judge Morrigan thinks it's in excess.

*

Cullen tells Cassandra about a number of kitchen incidents involving his mabari. His mini peanut butter chocolate cakes are deemed a good flavour, though the icing is messy and the judges would have liked to have seen him try something different after already having made chocolate cake.

*

Josephine's first batch of pecan brittle for the top of her mini pecan and maple syrup cakes burns, and she has to rush to make a second. She manages, but stresses over her timings and gets very flustered. Cassandra helps to calm her nerves by reassuring her they have time, and she's doing well.

*

Dorian questions Iron Bull on his upbringing under the Qun and their lack of cakes and sweets while he prepares his mini citrus olive oil cakes. The judges are impressed by his bake and flavours, though say his decoration could have been a bit more interesting. Dorian accepts the critique with grace, though he has a few quips for the camera later.

*

Zevran and Varric discuss the stupidest cakes they've ever seen, and Zevran narrowly avoids name-dropping one of judge Morrigan's old recipes. Varric's butter cakes end up slightly soggy, though the judges don't fault the flavour.

*

Judge Morrigan deems Leliana's mini coconut-vanilla bean cakes with meringue buttercream frosting “overambitious”, considering she only gets thirty of thirty six fully iced, and the coconut flavour is overwhelming. Again, she seems unworried by her incomplete bake and criticism.

*

Cassandra keeps an eye on Josephine, apparently aware she might be bowing under the strain. Her own almond honey cakes with strawberry cream end up tasting good, but their finish is messy, though Cassandra willingly made that trade off to get them finished on time.

**Results**

**Star Baker:**  Vivienne

“Of course I'm pleased, darling,” Vivienne says to camera. “None of us got this far by being poor bakers. I am up against the best, and I plan to win again the best.”

 **Eliminated:**  Blackwall

“I deserved to go,” Blackwall says, on leaving the tent. “I had a good time, but I didn't do my best. I'm sure the others will go on and do amazing thing. It's a shame I didn't get to try, but I'm probably a better carpenter than a baker anyway.”


	2. Week 2: Biscuits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Solas, Vivienne, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera, Varric, Cole, Cassandra, Leliana, Cullen and Josephine

The ratings for the first episode of the season were the highest season opener yet, and the excited buzz around the show has begun. The hashtag _#GSBO_ trended in both Fereldan and Orlais during broadcast and for hours afterwards.

**Signature Challenge: Crackers**

Cole seems genuinely delighted to have made it past the first round. His cheesy crackers are meant to be in animal shapes, but none of them end up looking like the animal cut-outs he designed. They're overbaked and the cheese doesn't taste very strong.

*

Vivienne tells Zevran about an Orlesian scandal involving a custard tart, which has enough rude details to keep him occupied for most of the challenge. Despite this apparent distraction, she works steadily, and her sweet cardamom crackers are said to be crisp, sweet and attractive.

*

Iron Bull and Dorian compares spices, and joke with Isabela about the various times they've eaten ridiculous spicy things for dares and bets. The rest of the tent seems a little perturbed by finding that to be a positive experience. His spicy 'Gaatlok' crackers are strong, but praised for the flavour.

*

Solas explains his insistence on locally sourced produce in all his baking. Solas' parmesan and thyme crackers aren't evenly sized, but the judges praise the flavour and appearance of them.

*

Isabela is surprised to find out that Sera keeps bees. Solas quizzes her on whether her hives are ethically managed, and she largely ignores him or makes fart sounds with her mouth. The judges love her pizza crackers for the rich flavour and fun appeal.

*

The judges slate Cullen's sweet potato crackers, though judge Harding says they could be _worse_ , probably. They're hard like cardboard and taste just as bad. Cullen swears by this health-conscious recipe.

*

Josephine seems to have her timings under control this week, and her sesame crackers impress the judges with their dainty appearance and their flavour. She and Zevran talk about Antivan baking, resulting in the much-repeated phrase “only in Antiva”.

*

“A good cracker should be spicy,” Dorian says, apparently giving a nod of approval at Iron Bull's bake.

“You like it hot, huh?” Iron Bull responds. Dorian manages not to swear (just) as he turns his attention back to his own spicy lentil papadums. They end up delighting the judges, who love the crunch.

*

Varric tells Cassandra he hasn't practised this week's bakes, and he's just hoping they go well. She stops talking to him. Despite his lack of practice, his multiseed cheese crackers fare pretty well in judging.

*

The look of Leliana's beet and cheddar crackers are praised by both judges, but don't deliver on flavour, though she is defiant to the criticism. Zevran and Isabela joke to alleviate the apparent tension between Leliana and judge Morrigan.

*

Cassandra has been practising her bakes all week, staying up at late hours after work to get things right. Her flaxseed and cracked pepper crackers are the fruits of that labour, and the judges like them.

**Technical Challenge: Fereldan Ginger Biscuits**

Cole's burnt biscuits are hard enough to break teeth at the judging table, but luckily it's just a case of bits flying off everywhere when they try to break one.

Vivienne is unfamiliar with the rustic recipe, and it shows when it comes to judging. Her biscuits don't have the right texture, and she overworked the mix.

Iron Bull has a small disaster when taking his bake out of the oven, with them sliding off the tray and two of the eight breaking. The judges still like the bake overall, but are disappointed by the broken biscuits.

Solas makes no attempt to follow the recipe provided, and make ginger biscuits to his own method using the ingredients provided. The judges have no idea when it comes to tasting, and think his bake is one of the stongest.

Sera also plays fast and loose with the instructions, deeming ginger biscuits “a doddle”. She delivers a strong contender, with good flavour if a little uneven in shape.

Cullen has made ginger biscuits before, which makes his resulting burnt, misshapen, over-gingered biscuit all the more embarrassing. At camera, after the challenge, he knows he's in trouble, but he will not give up so easily.

Josephine's biscuits have too much sugar in them, so they don't create the right texture, and although she is clearly disappointed, she is happy that she managed to stay cool under pressure.

Dorian puts way too much ginger in his biscuits, and the judge fault the overpowering flavour, and the brittle texture of his biscuits.

Varric seems the most surprised that his ginger biscuits turn out to take the top spot in the challenge, considering he doesn't even like the way Fereldans make them.

Leliana's biscuits are deemed not to have enough ginger in them, and are over baked thanks to no cooking time being given to the bakers in their instructions.

Cassandra's ginger biscuits are praised for their great taste and texture, despite looking a bit rough. Cassandra laments her lack of finesse to camera after judging.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Cole, Cullen, Josephine, Vivienne, Leliana, Iron Bull, Dorian, Cassandra, Sera, Solas, Varric

**Showstopper Challenge: 12 Cookies**

Cole's peanut butter cookies are decorated with shop-bought sugar flowers. The judges both disapprove, but his bake and flavour is praised while highlighting the disconnect between the cookie and the unnecessary decoration.

*

Even Vivienne doesn't seem immune to Zevran's charms, and lets him polish off the remains of her cookie dough – only once she's made enough for her batch and spares. Her mocha and macadamia nut cookies get thumbs up all round from the judges.

*

At the bench in front of Dorian, Iron Bull delights in flirting with him about the view he has of him bending over to put things in the oven. Dorian scoffs, but seems to enjoy the banter. Bull's dark chocolate pistachio sea salt cookies are a hit with the judges.

*

Solas makes oatmeal and raisin cookies from a recipe apparently passed down through many generations. They are over baked and too hard, though the flavours are good. (“But they've got raisins in!” Sera says, confused, to camera.)

*

Sera buzzes with excitement for this round, claiming to have been so excited to make cookies she couldn't decide on a recipe. The one she did settle on are hot cocoa cookies, with a gooey chocolate centre and little marshmallows, that are praised for the effort and skill involved.

*

Cullen follows his recipe to the letter, but his earl grey flavoured cookies don't go much to plan. He burns his first batch of cookies, and has to rush his second. They've under-baked as a result, and the judges agree that the bone shape and lack of flavour make them seem more like dog treats.

*

Josephine manages another round without letting time get away from her. She seems much more relaxed for having got a handle on her timings. Her mint chocolate cookies have a good flavour, though judge Morrigan isn't a fan of her using colouring to make the dough green.

*

Dorian is praised for the balance of flavour in his honey sesame cookies, which initially caused doubted amongst the judges. He spends his spare time on the challenge leaving seemingly accidental but obvious openings for innuendo-laden comments from Iron Bull.

*

Varric is a bit disappointed that the technical challenge ended up being ginger as well, but he thinks his ginger cookies are different enough. The judges agree that it's a simple cookie done well, except for the uneven size of them.

*

Leliana and Josephine rally to try and encourage Cullen after his burnt bake. Leliana's pumpkin spice cookies are well received, despite some doubts over an overdone flavour combination.

*

Lemon-lime basil cookies are, by Cassandra's own admittance, something not like she'd usually try. It seems to show, and her flavours are week and not balanced well, even if they do look pretty.

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Sera

“Proper chuffed,” she says. “There'd be arrows and things if I didn't win making cookies, right?”

 **Eliminated:** Cullen

“Truth be told, I was just happy to not be the first to go,” he says. “Nobody would let me live that down.”


	3. Week 3: Bread

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Solas, Vivienne, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera, Varric, Cole, Cassandra, Leliana and Josephine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't forget! I just got sidetracked with a giant fic. More to come :)

Cullen trends after his appearance on the companion show 'An Extra Slice', hosted by famous chef Wynne. He's apparently gained a large following that he seems baffled by, though bringing his mabari to the studio certainly helps.

**Signature Challenge: Freeform Loaf**

Cole's carrot and banana bread loaf is as terrible as it sounds. The flavours are a terrible match, to the point that even Harding can barely stomach it. Cole apologises a lot.

*

Vivienne trades quips with judge Morrigan over her choice for her loaf, though she is cool under the judge's steely gaze. Her rosemary and onion bread loaf is full of flavour and looks great.

*

Isabela seems to have changed her tact from flirting with Iron Bull herself, to encouraging his flirtations with Dorian. The Bull's milk bread loaf is a traditional Qun recipe, and a deceptively simple one. The judges really enjoy it, especially judge Morrigan, who hasn't had milk loaf before.

*

Solas recalls baking the loaf he's chosen to make as child, discussing the lack of modern equipment he grew up with. The judges praise Solas' honey-wheat loaf, and say that the rustic appearance suit the flavours he's chosen for it.

*

Sera skirts the censors with the original shape of her orange and cranberry bread loaf on first proving, but makes it a regular shape when it goes in to bake. The judges are very impressed with her flavours.

*

Zevran and Josephine show the tent a little traditional Antivan dance, and it seems Josephine is managing her time much better, because her cinnamon buttermilk bread plait has no problems in the baking, and the judges are very happy with her offering.

*

Dorian gets flustered when he realises the cameras have caught him holding up a small bowl of his spice mix for the Bull to smell, while maintaining a significant amount of eye contact. His spicy cheese pull-apart bread loaf is a judge's favourite.

*

The judges don't like Varric's beer bread loaf, calling it too bitter and under baked. Varric takes it in stride, joking to camera afterwards. “You put enough beer in, nobody's going to care what it tastes like.”

*

Leliana sings while she works, Josephine and Sera both join in for an impromptu sing-along. Her apricot cream cheese babka is a complicated bake, but she delivers on flavour and complexity.

*

Cassandra tells Josephine about Nevvaran dance, though falls short of offering to show her any moves. Her pumpkin bread loaf is under proved, but the judges like the flavour.

**Technical Challenge: Frostback Basin Soda Bread**

Cole gets flustered when he doesn't understand the steps of his bake. Varric tries to calm him, but it doesn't seem to help the end result, which is slated by the judges.

Unfamiliar with the bread in question, Vivienne struggles somewhat with the brief, though she makes a fair effort with it.

As he's kneading his dough, Iron Bull teases Dorian about him not wanting to get “down and dirty”, and “pound it good”. The judges are impressed with what he delivers.

While Solas talks at length about the history of Avvar bread, his loaf is only a passable one, much to his clear disappointment.

Sera's bread only just misses out on a top 3 judges slot because she leaves it in the oven too long, having got distracted talking to Dorian about her girlfriend, who she thinks Dorian “could nerd about with, yeah?”

Josephine draws on her knowledge of a bread from Antiva that she knows is similar, and this works well for her, seeing her coming out on top of this challenge.

Dorian grouses about not being born for “rustic” bakes, and his lack of knowledge shows when he produces a poor showing in the judging.

His bake isn't great, but Varric doesn't seem to mind, more concerned about keeping Cole together than focusing on his own method.

Leliana apparently spent some time learning traditional Avvar recipes in her youth, and is shows when she can recreate the recipe despite the unclear instructions.

Cassandra delivers a good bread, though the judges have minor criticism on the appearance and the texture, and the over salting of her dough.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Cole, Dorian, Varric, Solas, Vivienne, Cassandra, Sera, Leliana, Iron Bull, Josephine

**Showstopper Challenge: Savoury Bagels**

Cole suffers a big dip in confidence after his poor showing in earlier rounds, and his peppery bagels are way too peppery, under proved and over baked.

*

Vivienne and Leliana discuss Orlesian food, large parts of the conversation in Orlesian, which causes some jokes about getting past censorship, though the conversation is perfectly innocent when translated for subtitles. She delivers a solid bake with her multiseed bagels.

*

Sera and Iron Bull make a lot of terrible and rude jokes about bagels and bagel holes, to Isabela and Zevran's delight. His black sesame seed and nori bagels are deemed “stunning” by judge Morrigan.

*

Solas' and the Iron Bull begin a game of mental chess as they wait for their bagels to prove. He finds his artistic flair with his tomato and basil bagels, which look fantastic and taste really good.

*

The judges aren't entirely sure about Sera's poppy seed and pepper bagels, not convinced on the balance she's got with the flavour, but thinks she did a good job on their technical execution.

*

Josephine talks Cassandra down from panic after she ruins her first dough. Her own chilli and smoked cheddar bagels are a little oddly shaped, but the judges like the finish and flavour.

*

Dorian's bacon bagels sound simple, but his method is complex, so he's not very chatty during the challenge, though he keeps laughing at Sera and the Bull's antics. His effort delivers some great results, and the judges praise his flavours and textures.

*

Varric is actually enthusiastic about this challenge, citing his love of bagels. Luckily, his everything bagels are a hit with the judges.

*

Although over proved, the judges like Leliana's poppy seed bagels well enough, though her they critique her techniques.

*

Cassandra ruins her first dough by making it too watery, and looks set to enter a spiral of misery before Josephine steps in and gives her a pep talk. She remakes her dough, and although she isn't able to prove it for as long as she needs, her sesame seed bagels still fair alright with the judges.

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Iron Bull

A voice crackles through the speaker of the Bull's phone. “Chief?”

“Guess who got star baker?” the Bull says, grinning to camera.

The voice hoots with joy. “Hey, the Chief got star baker!”

The cheering on the line becomes loud enough to make the boom mic operator move away.

 **Eliminated:** Cole

“I didn't want to upset anybody,” he says, after almost everyone cries on him leaving the tent. “I just want everyone to have fun and make lots of delicious things.”

 


	4. Week 4: Pies and Tarts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Solas, Vivienne, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera, Varric, Cassandra, Leliana and Josephine

_#AdoptCole_ trends during the airing of the show, and again two days later during _An Extra Slice_ where he gets very excited about all the guest bakes. Someone finds an online fund raiser Cole started months before GSBO for his local primary school to be able to run an after-school baking club; after months of only tiny donations, exposure results in the fund raiser meeting and exceeding its target within four hours. Cole's twitter becomes a flood of individual thanks to donors.

**Signature Challenge: Meat Pie**

“Does this suit your style, Madam?” Zevran asks, leaning on Vivienne's countertop. “You are a very beautiful, skilled woman, but I cannot imagine this is... regular for you?”

“Have no fear, darling,” Vivienne says, as she flicks a knife efficiently back and forth along a sharpening steel. “I know how to handle meat.”

“Well,” Zevran says in an aside to camera, “I am frightened _and_ aroused!”

Vivienne's spiced beef and red wine pie is decorated with an intricate design carved into the pastry, and the judges are very impressed with her flavours.

*

Iron Bull's offering of curried goat and potato pie gets Josephine, Zevran and Isabela, in a nostalgic mood. Sera takes to passing by Bull's bench and bleating at random intervals, declaring his pie sounds underdone.

*

Varric calls Solas on his claim that pork and apple pie is an ancient elvish recipe, and they get into an argument that only Solas seems to take seriously. He gets distracted and leaves his pie in the oven too long, leaving it overdone.

*

While Sera's chicken and bacon pie is deemed by the judges to have a good flavour they call it a 'disaster' to look at, with the pastry to thin and letting the fat from the seep out. Sera is ecstatic to get the first “soggy bottom” of the season.

*

Josephine's barbecue pork pie also has a leak that has to be patched, but aside from that hiccup, is a beautiful and tasty offering, praised by both judges especially for her spicing and presentation. Josephine is delighted, and the small problem of the leak didn't fluster her this week.

*

“So,” Leliana says, at Dorian's worktop, where he's working on curried lamb pie. “You and Bull are both making curry pies?”

“Yes,” he says warily.

“You are influencing each other? Are you spending lots of time together?”

“What?” Dorian sputters.

“I never kiss and tell,” the Bull pipes up from the bench in front.

“You are _impossible_ ,” Dorian grumbles, as he blushes and continues cooking his pie. At judging it gets an excellent reception, praised for the spices and tender meat.

*

Varric's beef and blue cheese pie is a bit slap-dash, with messy pastry that's too thick in places, but at least it doesn't leak. The judges think it's overcooked, and the flavour balance isn't very pleasant, the cheese much too overpowering for the uncharacteristically weak flavour of the beef.

*

Leliana's duck l'orange pie is a daring attempt at turning an Orlesian classic into a pie, and it is an unmitigated disaster. Her duck is undercooked, her flavours don't work, and her pastry is terrible. Although she is clearly disappointed, she declares that if she doesn't try, how will she ever succeed?

*

Cassandra is calm and collected for this challenge, comfortable with the theme and the recipe for her mutton pie. She talks at leisure with Josephine, and delivers a pie with a good balance of spice, with simple but attractive pastry.

**Technical Challenge: 6 Egg Custard Tarts**

Vivienne flies through the challenge, familiar with what is being asked of them. The neat presentation of her tarts is praised especially in the blind-judging.

Big hands get the best of Iron Bull, who can usually handle delicate tasks without much issue, but the super-crumbly texture of his pastry means his tarts end up broken and messy, leaking custard. He takes it in stride, but seems pretty disappointed to camera afterwards.

“A test,” Solas says, “of our skills and existing knowledge base. Anyone with an interest in baking should be able to create a simple pastry, and an egg custard. Combining the two shouldn't prove difficult.”

It proves a little difficult for Solas, who has trouble getting his custard to set, and scores low in the judging.

Despite making a good custard, Sera struggles with her pastry, and her tarts end up rather messy and uneven in shape, though they taste good.

Josephine under bakes her pastry and her custard is barely set, her tarts neither falling short or standing out in the judging.

Although he derides the custard tart for being boring food, Dorian is able to deliver a passable attempt at the challenge.

Varric's custard doesn't set, leaving his tarts a mess, easily putting him at the bottom of the judging.

Leliana is well-versed in making custard tarts, and makes a strong contender that places high in the judge's rankings.

Her tarts are attractive, taste good, and show her skills at following only basic instructions, and Cassandra is very pleased with her attempt.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Varric, Iron Bull, Sera, Solas, Josephine, Dorian, Leliana, Cassandra, Vivienne

**Showstopper Challenge: Fruit Tart**

Despite some initial concerns that her planned bake would be too simple for week four, Vivienne bakes a beautiful nectarine and honey tart, the fruit arranged in a swirling pattern that delights the judges.

*

Iron Bull's lime and macadamia nut tart is an adventurous one, but the judges are impressed with his mix of flavours, the lime not too sharp but not lost to the richness of the pastry or nuts. (Sera's mic picks her up gigging “Rich nuts!”)

*

Solas burns his first pastry, and has to blind-bake another. Despite that hiccup, his plum tart is praised by the judges on it's flavour, though they deem the appearance too plain.

*

Isabela and Sera devote much of the challenge to flirting outrageously while she works on her apple and rhubarb tart. Her lack of focus leaves her with overdone edges of her tart, and the judges aren't happy with the overcooked rhubarb element.

*

“I don't think it's too complex,” Josephine says of her raspberry, almond and pear tart. “And even if it is complicated, I'm quite capable.”

Her timings down now, she has things in hand as she prepares a complex recipe. The judges are impressed by the complex processes and the flavour of the tart she delivers.

*

Dorian and Bull trade quips as they work, and Zevran keeps score of their insults, eventually declaring Bull the winner for some of his puns. The judges are very impressed with Dorian's lemon velvet tart.

*

“My mother's recipe,” Varric says, as he works on his spiced fruit tart, “about the only thing she ever gave me.” Varric takes his time with the task, and gives it his full concentration, resulting in an attractive tart with a good flavour that the judges praise highly.

*

Although a classic bake, Leliana's strawberry tart does not go to plan. Her strawberries don't hold their form and soak through the pastry, leaving a soggy mess of a tart for the judges.

*

Cassandra's apple tart is simple, but she takes her times with all the elements and although the pattern she tries to create with the fruit doesn't come out as well as she'd hoped, the judges are still happy with her offering.

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Vivienne

“Practice matters, of course,” she says, “but an innate skill for the art of baking doesn't go amiss. Not everyone has it in them, though everyone is proving worthy competition.”

 **Eliminated:** Leliana

“I would not feed my nugs some of the things I baked today,” she laughs easily. “But I had a lot of fun. That is the point, no?”


	5. Week 5: Pastry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Solas, Vivienne, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera, Varric, Cassandra and Josephine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not dead I'm just terrible! I'll try and be more prompt with updates.

 

In the wake of Leliana's departure, she was unreachable for comment. Rumours abound on her whereabouts in the months between filming and broadcast, including one that she had taken a job offer from Par Vollen as the private chef to the Arishok.

**Signature Challenge: Éclairs**

While she works on her lemon meringue éclairs, Vivienne tells Isabela about a scandal famous in Orlais involving a six tiered wedding cake and a very drunk groom. Her bake does well at judging, although there is some difference of opinion on her flavour balance, and the quality of her meringue.

*

Iron Bull talks with Sera for most of the challenge time after Dorian shuts down his first attempt at flirting. His matcha green tea éclairs divide the judges, with judge Morrigan liking them, and judge Harding finding the flavour overpowering. She does praise his technique however, and they look nice even though the decoration is a little clumsy.

*

The tent is treated to Solas' knowledge of coffee as he works on his coffee éclairs, an a lengthy discussion with Josephine about Antivan coffees, with some choice colourful anecdotes from Zevran. At judging, his flavour combinations are praised, even if his design is deemed over-simple.

*

Sera makes a mess filling her custard éclairs, which she is delighted with.

“Custard's not neat,” she says, as she pipes a pastry until it's bursting with custard cream. “Custard's splat and sloosh.”

The mess remains at judging, with overfilled éclairs that the judges call a disaster, despite their good flavour.

*

Josephine runs into trouble with her cream, and almost backslides on the improvement she'd made with getting her timings right; luckily her second batch works out much better. While it's a risky flavour combination which has the judges apprehensive, her violet éclairs impress with their subtle flavour and cute design.

*

Surprisingly quiet and focused, Dorian concentrates on his chilli chocolate éclairs without engaging much with the other bakers. Both the judges say that his chilli is only just at the right level, risking being too strong, but that his flavours and execution are extremely good.

*

“The Iron Lady's unflappable, and Sera's more dangerous with custard than Dorian is with spices,” Varric says, giving a run down of how things in the tent are fairing. “We're getting to the halfway point. Not as competitive as I thought, though. Not exactly cut-throat television, huh?” His salted caramel éclairs fair well with the judges.

“And how am I faring, Varric?” Cassandra asks.

“Steady as always, Seeker.”

*

Cassandra's triple chocolate éclairs are called 'unrefined'; the flavours are good, but the judges are expecting more impressive things in week five. She takes the critique in stride, though questions it to camera later.

**Technical Challenge: Croissants**

Vivienne has no problems with the technical bake, being familiar with croissants and having an easy time of working to the basic recipe, and ranks high in the judging.

“Flaky pastry isn't great when you've got big hands,” Iron Bull says, though he gets a handle of the recipe and turns out a good end result.

Solas has some familiarity with the pastry type for today's challenge, but at judging his croissants are misshapen, and the texture is too close.

“Poncy, flaky, stupid food, this is,” Sera grumbles. The recipe doesn’t have clear instructions, and her knowledge base doesn't cover it. “Who wants to eat this? It all ends up down your _[bleep]_! Top. I meant top, down your top, right?”

Despite confessing to have never made them before, Josephine's croissants impress the judges the most, earning her the top spot in the blind judging.

Dorian remains quiet throughout the technical challenge. His croissants are made with skill, and only just lose a place to Vivienne's in the blind judging.

Seemingly more interested in how everyone else is getting on than watching his oven, Varric over bakes his croissants.

Cassandra gets flustered when a pastry she knows how to make proves more of a challenge than she expected. Despite encouragement from the tent, her mood sours with each new problem, and she burns her croissants, leaving her last in the judging.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Cassandra, Sera, Solas, Varric, Iron Bull, Dorian, Vivienne, Josephine

**Showstopper Challenge: Savoury Parcels**

Vivienne's Rivaini chicken parcels draw on her cultural roots, blending spices and fruits into her mixture. Judge Morrigan questions the sincerity of the choice, given Vivienne's mostly Orlesian leanings, but her flavours and presentation are praised by both judges.

*

Zevran points the cameraman to the Iron Bull's bench, where his mic and Dorian's are picking up their conversation.

“I'll stop, if I'm making you uncomfortable,” the Bull says. “Just say so, I don't want you off your baking game because you're hung up on this.”

“Bull, it's not that I don't like how we've... I mean, at first I thought you might have—” Dorian suddenly seems to remember they're wired for sound. “Nonsense,” he says, grinning. “It'll take more than some terrible flirting if you want to put me off.”

“Terrible? You like it.”

Dorian rolls his eyes, and when the camera pulls focus back to Zevran, he looks like he's won the lotto.

The Bull's fish parcels are an interesting bake, that go down well with the judges despite some initial reservations.

*

Taking a vegetarian option, Solas' vegetable pasties are filled with green and red vegetables and subtle Fereldan spices. They're called lacklustre and bland by the judges, but judge Harding praises his pastry work.

*

“I'm making beef pockets,” Sera says, completely straight-faced. As she gets on with sealing her beef cuts, Isabela is the first to break, descending into giggles that spread through the tent until the camera crew has to break to gather themselves.

*

The flavour of Josephine's lamb and mint parcels is subtle and rich, and the judges are very impressed with her techniques shown.

*

Dorian too is doing a vegetarian option, making spiced potato samosas. Zevran questions whether the spice will be enough to hold them up and make them stand out, but Dorian is confident. It pays off, when the judges are wowed by his samosas.

*

Varric's steak and cheese pasties are rich and hearty, and get approval from both judges, despite having some issue with leaking fat on a couple of his pasties.

*

“This is a mistake,” Cassandra says. “I've only practised these once, I chose them because they use more skills, but I'm not more skilled at making them.”

“It will be fine,” Josephine says, and Cassandra's smile looks mostly for show. Her nerves show through, and her chicken and cheese pasties do not work out well, the filling watery and the pastry soggy.

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Dorian

“Happy, yes,” Dorian says to camera, as squirrels dart about the lawn in the back of shot. “Thrilled, rather. I didn't think this was going to be my week, but it all came up well. Including some things I wasn't expecting to go well at all..”

 **Eliminated:** Cassandra

“I tried my hardest, and if anyone wishes to criticise me for that, they can try,” Cassandra says. “I will miss it, however. I have made some good friends here. It's been a wonderful time.”


	6. Week 6: Desserts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Solas, Vivienne, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera, Varric and Josephine

 

Cassandra has found herself a gay icon since leaving the tent, fielding interview after interview from Lesbian interest magazines and LGBT news sites, and 'the Pentaghast' is apparently the current popular trend in lesbian hairstyles.

**Signature Challenge: Trifle**

“What kind of trifle are you making, lady Vivienne?” Zevran asks.

“Strawberry meringue, darling.”

“Ah, Orlesian, no? You think the judges will think it was because they mentioned your Rivaini flavours last week?”

“The apostate judge's opinions on my relationship with my heritage in my baking is of little concern to the choice I made for today's challenge.”

“'The apostate judge'?”

“Yes,” Vivienne drawls, not looking up from her workbench. At judging, her trifle is praised for it's elaborate decoration and strong, traditional flavours.

*

 Iron Bull's strawberry pistachio trifle includes pistachio sponge fingers, strawberry jelly and a rose cream. Judge Morrigan doesn't like the rose flavour, but judge Harding praises his flavours and the overall neat appearance of his trifle.

*

 Solas' ambitious pineapple and orange trifle consists of five layers. “Of course cream and citrus is a flavour combination many bakers shy away from. But we're not here to take the easy route.” His trifle ends up somewhat sloppy, with his jelly not setting well, and his sponge going soggy.

*

 There's some murmurs about Sera's offering being strange and potentially disastrous, but she's excited to work on her pumpkin butterscotch gingerbread trifle. Some of the gingerbread figures she makes for the side of the trifle end up with missing limbs, but the overall effect is praised by the judges. The flavours are a bit weak, even though they do compliment each other.

*

 “Ive been excited to use this flavour combination,” Josephine says. She's making a raspberry and lime trifle, with pink cream and sour sponge fingers. “Being here has made me more adventurous, I think! I'm trying more things.”

*

 Dorian's triple berry trifle is rich and fruity, and although it has some issues with the fruit bleeding, the judges are impressed by how light he's managed to keep the sponge and cream.

*

 “It's not a trifle if it's not boozy,” Varric's says, liberally tipping brandy onto his sponge. His brandy chocolate trifle is rich, and Varric seems to have a lot of fun putting to together. The judges agree that it's sloppy and the brandy is overpowering.

**Technical Challenge: Oven-Baked Vanilla Cheesecake**

Vivienne has no problem with following the basic instructions for the technical, and her cheesecake is nearly perfect.

Although he's excited for the technical, Iron Bull has trouble with his base not setting, and his mixture. He has to leave his cheesecake in the oven to ensure it's cooked, but it means its over baked, and he doesn't have time to decorate it. The judges criticise every element of the challenge, and Bull seems quite disheartened.

Solas manages a fair attempt at the cheesecake, which scores in the middle of the blind judging.

Sera has difficulty with the instructions, especially the lack of listed cooking time. She under bakes her cheesecake as a result.

Josephine keeps a cool head during the technical challenge and creates a “perfect” cheesecake. She cries to camera afterwards in happiness.

Dorian's technical challenge is uneventful, and he managed a good cheesecake that impresses the judges.

Very relaxed throughout, Varric takes the lack of detailed instructions in stride, and the cheesecake he creates is sloppy, lopsided, and lacking in vanilla flavour.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Iron Bull, Varric, Sera, Solas, Dorian, Vivienne, Josephine

**Showstopper Challenge: Croquembouche (Profiterole Tower)**

The judges are worried about the delicate flavours Vivienne is trying to balance with her grapefruit and white chocolate croquembouche, but they needn't have worried, because she manages it with flair. The grapefruit is sharp and strong, the chocolate cuts through it with sweetness, and her tower is sturdy and attractive.

*

 “What's better than a bowl of little pastry bun things?” Iron Bull says to camera. “A whole tower of little pastry bun things.” With the clever application of caramel, he manages to add choux pastry horns to his coffee and caramel croquembouche, which delights and impresses the judges.

*

Although Solas' earl grey and vanilla croquembouche works structurally, the judges are not taken on his flavour combination, and some of the buns are under-filled.

*

 “I had loads of ideas, but I'm not a builder,” Sera tells Isabela. “So I went simple, yeah? So I can get it right. Don't want to go home. At least not before _someone_.” Her chocolate and pecan croquembouche has some structural issues, namely the overuse of caramel to get it to stay as a tower, but her flavours are right on the mark.

*

 The judges are also wary of Josephine's flavour plans, as rose and white chocolate can be a disaster if the rose is overpower. But her croquembouche delights the judges, and her elegant finish with edible shimmering power makes the whole thing look, in judge Morrigan's startled opinion “quite magical”.

*

 “Yes, yes, I'm doing spices again. Chocolate is too predictable for this.”

“You like it spicy, huh, Dorian?” Bull calls, and Dorian rolls his eyes. His cardamom and saffron croquembouche is certainly the most risky bake of the day, and the judges are slip. Judge Harding finds the cardamom cream doesn't work, but judge Morrigan likes it more, and both are impressed with the use of the saffron within the choux buns.

*

 It's clear that Varric has lost his drive for the competition, and in a bizarre act of self sabotage, he bakes chicken and chocolate croquembouche. It's just as terrible as it sounds flavour wise, and it looks a mess, but his tower does stay standing.

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Vivienne

“I think today myself and Josephine were rather evenly matched,” Vivienne says, thoughtfully to camera as geese honk distantly in the back of shot. “I'm grateful that the judges saw the skill present in my bakes, but if they'd chosen Josephine for star baker today, I wouldn't have felt any shame in losing to her. We both live to compete again, and I look forward to the challenge!”

 **Eliminated:** Varric

“Well, I'm not surprised,” he says. “I wasn't going to win, and everyone else is so serious about it. Didn't feel fair when I'm just in it for the jokes.”


	7. Week 7: Pâtisserie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Solas, Vivienne, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera and Josephine

 

Vivienne's “the apostate judge” becomes a minor internet meme in the wake of the week's episode airing.

Meanwhile, Varric has begun hinting at a tell-all book about his time in the bake off, to be released when the series has finished airing. On the subject of the winner, he seemed to reference it on his twitter only with: “Spoilers, people!”

**Signature Challenge: Macarons**

“Orlesian macarons are the best in Thedas, without competition,” Vivienne says, as she prepares the mix for her passion fruit macaroons. “But the idea of making them a protected product of Orlais is absurd. Should we bar any nation from building ships, because the Antivans do it best?”

Her macarons are praised by the judges, but they do say that her familiarity with the recipe made them expect her to try a recipe that was a bit more complex.

*

“You expect this to work?” Zevran asks, hovering by Iron Bull's bench as he measures ingredients.

“You not up for a bit of adventure?”

“Don't tease me, my large friend,” Zevran says.

Bull's bacon and blue cheese macarons are definitely out there, flavour wise, but they deliver, with both judges praising the unique idea.

*

“A little simple, aren't they?” Dorian asks, peering at Solas' workbench, where he's making apple macarons.

“We can't all be as extravagant as you, Dorian.”

Though judge Harding says the sweet-sharp of the apple is really nice, judge Morrigan does say that in week seven, they are “a passable, exceedingly simple bake”. Solas, to camera, is not amused by the criticism.

“As if simplicity is a measure of a macaron's worth – I think Morrigan is rather short-sighted.”

*

Sera's recipe for this challenge is a little more conservative than some of her previous ones: chocolate and pistachio macarons.

“A bit... boring, aren't they?” Isabela asks. “For you, I mean.”

Sera shrugs. “My girlfriend likes these ones. I bought some for her before we started being like this,” she crosses her fingers. “I'd feel bad if I didn't make her favourites, yeah?”

*

Josephine is mixing sharp, fruity flavours that has the judges interested in seeing what comes of it; raspberry and gooseberry macarons, decorated with edible flowers.

“A macaron is a deceptively simple thing, but Orlais is about performance,” she says. “I'm sad Leliana didn't get to this round, I'm sure she would have outstripped us all in this challenge.”

*

“Look,” Dorian says, showing his purple-stained fingertips from making his blackberry macarons to the camera. “How I'm suffering for my bake. They better like them.”

Dorian burns his first lot of macarons, but manages another batch, which the judged _do_ like.

**Technical Challenge: Baklava**

Vivienne has no trouble with the recipe, delivering a great bake.

After an issue with his syrup, Iron Bull manages to pull together an excellent offering for the blind judging.

Solas' bake is soggy and lumpy, after he misunderstands key parts of the recipe.

Sera burns her baklava, leaving it too long in the oven since so cooking times where given.

Managing to make it through the recipe without getting flustered like she did in earlier weeks, Josephine delivers a great flavoured bake.

Dorian's pastry isn't great, which lets down his bake somewhat, and sees his dish criticised in the judging.

In a first for the the technical challenge, the top three entries judged equally good, with only minor things making the difference between places.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Sera, Solas, Dorian, Iron Bull, Josephine, Vivienne

**Showstopper Challenge: Mousse Cake with Pastry Decoration**

“The flavour of a bake can't save it, if it looks like a disaster,” Vivienne says, as she shows Isabela her decorating plans for her cake. “Certainly not in week seven.” Her lemon and raspberry mousse cake delivers on flavour, and impresses the judges with her decoration: an intricate hand-piped damask pattern.

*

“Do you think you have enough chocolate?” Zevran asks, gesturing at Iron Bull's bench, where there are piles of three different kinds of chocolate for his triple chocolate mousse cake.

“Gotta have extra.”

“In case it goes wrong?”

“Yeah. And people stealing it,” Bull says, and Zevran smiles around a mouthful of stolen chocolate.

*

Sera is making a mess of her bench while she works on her lemon and honey mousse cake. She hums as she works, which has Solas glaring daggers at her for most of the challenge. The judges are impressed with her flavours, though they think her presentation could be more impressive.

*

“How much have you practised this bake?” Zevran asks Josephine, as she works on her lavender and rose mousse cake.

“Four times this week. I hope it's enough.”

It certainly is – though judge Morrigan is not a fan of either flavour, she does praise Josephine's skill and artful decoration.

*

“Of course we're doing mousse on a sweltering day like today!” Dorian grouses. “At least it's not ice cream cake, I suppose..”

“Don't tell me you don't like it hot, big guy,” Bull says.

“When will you run of ways to make the same ridiculous joke?” Dorian huffs, but he's smiling as he goes back to his baking. His chocolate and coffee mousse cake impresses the judges with it's flavour combination, and the decoration of tempered chocolate and coffee truffles shows off a variety of skills.

*

Solas' cake mix doesn't work, because he used salt instead of sugar. He is convinced Sera swapped them out in a prank, and confronts her.

“This is not a game, Sera, this is sabotage!”

“Oi, why do you think it's me? I didn't swap them. Got more important things today, yeah?”

Solas seems unconvinced, but carries on with a second sponge for his mixed berry mousse cake. But as the challenge time counts down, he realises someone has moved his mousse cake to a different shelf in the fridge.

“Who moved my cake?” he demands.

Sera shrugs her shoulders. “Your cake is tiny, I needed the bigger shelf.”

“It hasn't set. You moved it and it hasn't _set_.”

“It's still been in the fridge, I just put it on a different shelf!”

His mousse indeed hasn't set, and as soon as he takes the tin from his cake, it slops all over his workbench.

“It's okay, you can save this,” Isabela encourages. Solas gives her a withering look, as he picks up the ruins of his cake and heads for the end of his workbench.

“Oh, don't, don't,” Isabela implores, but Solas dumps his entire bake into the bin.

When he presents the wastebin for judging, both judges are flabbergasted.

“I couldn't serve you what I'd created.”

“But you could have served us something,” judge Morrigan says, “and we could have judge the parts individually, even if the bake didn't work.”

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Dorian

“I'm amazed, after my poor show in the technical,” he says, grinning. “Just the other night, I was saying to B—but mean, I worked hard in the other challenges, I'm glad the judges could see that.”

 **Eliminated:** Solas

“I cannot fault them. I didn't present a final bake, so they had nothing to judge.”

On his claims that Sera sabotaged him:

“We'll see if her antics make it into the edit, won't we?”


	8. Week 8: Chocolate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Vivienne, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera and Josephine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Biscuits” in this context is the British use, as in sweet cookies, not a scone-esque bread with gravy. 'Cookie' over here is a specific type of biscuit (with chocolate chips/chunks through it), rather than an umbrella term.

_#Moussegate_ inevitably trended straight after last week's episode aired, and gave the tabloids a whole lot to write about, with vocal fans on each side stating their case for whether Solas or Sera was at fault for Solas' mousse failure. As the show is aired months after it's filmed, the incident had already been investigated, and Sera found not to have sabotaged him.

On the tie-in show _An Extra Slice_ Solas concedes that his mousse was unlikely to set regardless of whether Sera had moved it or not, but he is still sure she swapped his sugar out for salt.

**Signature Challenge: Chocolate Fondue with Biscuits**

“I suspect they're looking for whether we neglect to make effort with the fondue part of this challenge,” Vivienne tells Isabela. “They didn't say how many biscuits to make, so I can already see we all have big plans – but one cannot forget that the chocolate must be the star. It's called _chocolate week_ for a reason.”

Vivienne's hazelnut chocolate fondue is served in a traditional Orlesian caquelon and réchaud. She serves coffee Orlesian twirl biscuits and vanilla langue de chat biscuits. Judge Harding is especially taken with her delicately flavoured fondue, calling it “exquisite”.

*

“Kinda simple,” Bull says, of his dark chocolate fondue, with orange biscuits and caramel biscuits. “But these flavours just _go_.”

His brief looked deceptively simple: his orange biscuits in fact involve at least six processes, including candying orange peel and making an orange jelly, and his caramel biscuits are delicate lattices.

The judges are hugely complimentary of his work and his process, how he executed all the parts of his bake and kept time well.

*

Sera's white chocolate fondue is accompanied by strawberry shortbread biscuits, and honeycomb biscuits – and little fondant bees feature throughout.

“Your biscuits are spoon-shaped,” Zevran says, amused.

“Well, yeah. Obvious, innit?”

The judges think her fondue is a little on the thick side, but are delighted with the overall design, and both of her biscuits impress them, even though they had a high rate of breakage.

*

 Josephine is making a white chocolate fondue as well, but she is unworried by this.

“Our flavours are different enough not for this to be an issue,” she assures Zevran.

Her lavender biscuits and Antivan lemon almond cantucci are delicately flavoured, and the judges agree that her fondue is at risk of overwhelming them with its richness, but in all her bake is superb.

*

Dorian looks a littly peaky, but he concentrates on spicing his chilli chocolate fondue just right.

“You alright, big guy?” Bull asks. “Maybe you should take a minute.”

“Oh, that's not very sporting is it, trying to put me out of action?” He's laughing, but he looks decidedly under the weather for the whole round.

He serves his fondue with traditional spiced Minrathous biscuits and tarragon wafers. The judges are very impressed with his spice balance, though the wafers are a little brittle.

**Technical Challenge: Chocolate and Thyme Tart**

Vivienne delivers a near perfect bake, though her pastry is not as good as it usually is. She places second in the blind ranking.

It's a close call, but the judges rank Iron Bull's tart as the winner due to it's perfect sheen finish and great texture.

Sera puts too much thyme in her tart, but seems to enjoy the challenge and the opportunity to make Bull laugh with various 'time' puns.

Josephine doesn't use enough thyme in hers, but the overall effect is more agreeable than Sera's, so she places slightly higher in ranking.

Losing track of time, Dorian catches the edges of his tart, over-baking it in the process, and although the contest is pretty close, this puts in at the bottom of the judging.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Dorian, Sera, Iron Bull, Vivienne, Josephine

**Showstopper Challenge: 3 x 20 Chocolate Truffles**

Vivienne shows off her skills with her choice of bakes. She makes walnut and coffee truffles, which are decorated with walnut halves and Sera insists they look like brain truffles. Also, raspberry and almond truffles that are striped pink and ivory, a delicate feat that is praised by the judges for its execution. Her white chocolate orange truffles, are light and subtle, with candied orange adding a little sweet bite to them.

*

Taking the boozy route, Iron Bull's first bake are Fereldan ale truffles, which work despite the judges' worries about them. His Antivan brandy truffles are a more traditional route, and a solid choice. His Sun-Blond truffles are a surprise hit, with their subtle fruity taste and alcoholic kick.

* 

“You like honey, don't you?” Isabela asks, leaning on Sera's workbench as she works on her honeycomb truffles.

“It's 'cos I'm sweet,” she says, face smeared with chocolate.

She also makes pecan truffles that come out a little oddly shaped but taste delicious, and white chocolate truffles, which are simple, but also a hit with the judges.

*

Josephine draws on some her favour flavours from Antiva, and makes hazelnut truffles with gold dusting, coffee truffles, and salted caramel truffles with a gooey caramel layer just inside the shell. The judges are impressed with her bakes and especially with the care she took with her presentation, without compromising the quality of her flavours.

*

Dorian looks, to quote Isabela, 'like ten men; nine dead and one dying'. Despite that, he pushes ahead with his plan for whiskey truffles, caramel truffles, and sour grape truffles.

He shakes off the worries of the rest of the bakers, presenters and judges, although at points it's clear he's struggling with not feeling well. The extent of it isn't revealed until halfway through the 5 hour bake time, when a sudden flurry of activity breaks out, and the cameraman rushes away from an aside with Zevran and Isabela in time capture Vivienne supporting Dorian, who has evidently collapsed.

“Sweet Maker, he's burning to the touch,” she says, hand at his forehead.

“[bleep], I told him to take it easy,” Bull says.

Dorian grumbles, apparently still conscious, but unable to stand. “I'll be fine, just give me a moment.”

His protests are ignored this time, and as Dorian is taken out of the tent by the medical team, all four other contestants have to be talked into staying instead of going with him.

Reluctantly, everyone gets back to work on their bakes. Everyone is very distracted, until a runner comes and tells them that Dorian is fine, but he's running a high fever and needs to rest for a few days. There is a verbal agreement that they should continue with their bakes, and some muted discussion about protest in the event that Dorian is eliminated on the grounds of being unwell.

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Iron Bull

“Yeah, I'm happy. I mean, I wish it had been a fair competition, with Dorian at his best, but I'm happy to get star baker again. Might be overkill to make Dorian a get-well-soon cake, but he was excited about the boozy truffles.”

**Eliminated:**

“I have the unenviable task of announcing who will be leaving us this week,” Isabela says. “It's been a bit of a dramatic day, but a decision still has to be made. The baker leaving the tent this week is...”

A dramatic pause.

“Nobody!”

A collective sigh of relief, bemused laughter following.

“Come on, that wouldn't be fair, would it? Next week Dorian should be back in fighting shape, and you can all duke it out then.”

*

“Do you think it's fair that Dorian wasn't eliminated?” the producer asks, in a one-on-one with Vivienne.

“Fair? Perhaps not. It's a competition after all, and each week the weakest baker is eliminated; despite no fault on his part, Dorian was the weakest baker.”

“So you think he should have been eliminated?”

“Oh, no! I've certainly no desire to pay mind the the idea of 'fairness' as set out in the competition rules in this issue. I don't believe that any of us would feel good about besting a man who was baking with a mind-altering fever. Fair, maybe, but it wouldn't be _right_.”


	9. Week 9: Substitutions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Sera, Vivienne, Iron Bull, Josephine and Dorian

The day after the episode airing, The Daily Message publishes a story under the headline _MALE BAKE OFF STAR IN HOSPITAL ROMP WITH BOYFRIEND_ , a sordid tale based on select quotes from “witnesses” after Dorian was taken into hospital months previously, after his collapse in the baking tent.

Dorian does a small interview in response with The Champion newspaper, where he describes himself as “not closeted, but not necessarily out until now”, and appears rather humoured by the stories. “Well, I suppose 'boyfriend' is right enough, but he only visited me, and stayed overnight at the hospital. I was rather too feverish and delicate for anything as salacious as they're implying.”

With no elimination the previous week, _An Extra Slice_ gets previous contestants and winners on to talk about this year's competition, and who they think will win.

**Signature Challenge: Gluten Free Savoury Muffins**

Vivienne's choice surprises the judges, who are used to refined, delicate flavours, and not something as rustic and hearty as her pork and caramelised onion muffins.

“We're late-game now, I ought to be surprising them at every turn,” she tells Zevran. “And I suspect everyone will be trying to pull out all the stops this week.”

“Me,” Dorian says, as he comes past her bench, “she means me. I've got to prove myself after last week, haven't I?”

“You had a fever, darling. That's not a personal failing, just an unfortunate circumstance.”

“Aren't you sweet.”

“Are you going to tell me that you're not going all-out today?” she asks, a raised eyebrow and a smile for him. Dorian smirks, slinking away from her bench and leaving her to get on with preparation for her muffins.

The judges are impressed with the end result, especially how she embraced the rustic appearance of them, not trying to clumsily over-refine a classic flavour.

*

“There's a joke in here somewhere, innit?” Sera says, as Iron Bull slices sausage for his sausage and egg muffins. She studies him as he works, trying not to laugh at her. “What? Sausage and egg. That's funny, right?”

“Everything's funny to you.”

“But sausage, right, like – _sausage_ —” Sera wanders away, cackling.

The judges are very impressed with the runny egg yolk in the middle of the Bull's muffins, though they do say that they're quite stodgy and heavy, although they taste really good.

*

 

Sera's pepperoni pizza muffins give her an excuse to make a mess of her workbench. Every time the cameras pass by, she and Isabela are eating pepperoni or cheese from her ingredients.

“I have extra,” she says. “I always have extra for pizza, you never know who might say they'll turn up, yeah?”

The cheese Sera puts over the top her muffins catches in the oven, browning a little too much in places. Despite this, the judges deem her creation delicious, though the look of it is unrefined.

*

Josephine's bake seems simple, though her bacon and tomato muffins are not to be underestimated.

“So, what's special about them?” Judge Morrigan teases. “Of course, you're doing something fancy, yes?”

“Well,” Josephine says, “I'm going to try and make the muffin mixture tomato flavoured, and I'm going to make a little pig on the top made out of cured bacon.”

“There it is. Week nine, it's all about being out there, isn't it?”

Her bake is deemed pretty successful at judging – not all of her pigs are identical, some not very pig-looking at all, but the flavours are great and her tomato flavoured muffin is strong and rich.

*

“If you need to collapse today, just shout me,” the Bull says, patting his stomach, “I'll give you something soft to land on.”

“I thought you were looking rounder,” Dorian says, narrowing his eyes at him, and clearly smothering a grin. “It's all the cake, Bull. You look like a proper baker now.”

Dorian's chicken tikka muffins are a hit with the judges, who are surprised at how light they are, despite the no gluten and the ingredients he's used.

**Technical Challenge: Gluten and Dairy Free Chocolate Brownies**

Vivienne, by her own admission, doesn't bake gluten free if she can help it, but she has an eye for the instructions, and is able to use her base knowledge of ingredients and processes to follow the recipe and produce a good quality brownie.

Inexperience with substitutional cooking shows for Iron Bull, who has trouble with the recipe instructions and comes away with flat, badly flavoured brownies. Though edible, they're not very enjoyable.

Sera's attempt is an absolute disaster. The only gluten free cooking she's done was her muffins from the morning bake, and the threadbare instructions that they're given in the technical leaves Sera guessing and throwing things together, hoping they work. Her offering is deemed the worst of the lot, and barely edible.

Josephine storms the judging with her perfect brownies, which turn out exactly how the judges expected. She has no trouble with the recipe, and thankfully has some experience with similar cooking that sees her through.

The instructions give Dorian some trouble, and his brownies turn out very gooey and misshapen, but they taste like the judges are expecting.

**Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Sera, Iron Bull, Dorian, Vivienne, Josephine

**Showstopper Challenge: Yeast Free Bread**

“This is Antivan!” Zevran declares. Vivienne laughs, adjusting her apron strings.

“I have never faulted Antivan bread, darling.”

“What about Antivan men?”

“Oh, I can't imagine they're all as terrible as you.”

Zevran clutches a hand to his chest dramatically. “You wound me, Madam!”

Her sweet onion and mushroom focaccia uses wild mushrooms and delicate spices, and the judges are very impressed with the texture of her bread.

*

“This was an easy pick,” Iron Bull says, as he works on his cheese and jalapeño cornbread. “Used to get cornbread all the time on the road. Usually it was stale, but better than some of the stuff I had on Seheron. Biscuits hard enough to break teeth.”

His cornbread is very spicy, and the judges debate whether it's too spicy for a bread, overpowering the cheese flavour.

*

“Yeast makes it go poof,” Sera says demonstrating with her hands the usual expansion of a bread dough. “What's it's going to do without? Pffft.” Her whole body seems to deflate as she blows a raspberry.

Her inexperience with yeast-free bread shows. Sera's three cheese loaf is flat and lacking flavour, despite the amount of cheese in it, disappointing the judges.

*

Although Josephine's honey and rosemary soda bread is traditionally a Fereldan bread, she says it's one of her favourites.

“I'm hoping the judges like it. It's simple bread, simple flavours, but I think it's nice.”

At judging, they are impressed by her flavours and the texture of her bake, though it doesn't look as neat as some of the other bakes she's presented recently.

*

“You're back on fighting form then, Dorian?” Judge Harding asks. He is making herb sultana naan.

“A little fever can't keep me down,” he says. “I'm glad to get to bake for another week.”

The judges like his flavour combinations, though aren't sure about the texture of his naan, and agree they could have done with longer in the oven to really crisp up.

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Josephine

“My sister is going to be so happy!” Josephine laughs. “Every week she wants to hear all about what is going on in the tent. I can't tell her much, because her friends would all know the very next day.”

**Eliminated:** Sera

“Would have liked to go out on custard, but at least it wasn't cookies,” Sera says. “Given me ideas, all of this. I'm not sad or anything.” She smiles, a little sadly. “Friends don't stop being friends after they leave the tent though.”


	10. Week 10: Mix It Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Vivienne, Iron Bull, Josephine and Dorian

On _An Extra Slice_ , Sera declares her intention to bring her vagina cupcakes to the world, and the show descends into various amounts of chaos, which the studio audience thoroughly enjoys. There are twenty six complaints to the broadcasting watchdog after the airing, but no action is taken since the program is (luckily) after the watershed.

**Signature Challenge: Sweet Loaves**

Vivienne sets to work on an elaborate panettone, a traditionally Antivan bread with her own delicate twist on flavour and décor.

“How do you feel about being in the semi-final?” Isabela asks.

“It's wonderful, darling. This really is the best of us, though I wouldn't say the competition was ever easy.”

Working diligently throughout the cooking time, Vivienne shows no sign of the stress the bakers are likely under. She chats with her fellow contestants easily, and the atmosphere in the tent is friendly and supportive of each other's endeavours.

“It's nearly the final,” she's saying to Zevran as she works on mixing icing, “we've all got to challenge ourselves, if we've any ho—”

“Aah!”

Vivienne turns and catches the Iron Bull's dough in mid-flight as it soars over his bench, before it can take a dramatic plummet to the floor.

“Well done!” Zevran cries, as the tent erupts into laughter and a slightly sheepish Bull comes around to fetch his dough back.

“What were you doing, Bull?”

“Just showing off, Ma'am.”

“Be a little more careful, dear. It's the semi-final, I'd hardly like to beat you because you threw your cake on the floor.”

Vivienne decorates the many facets of her star-shaped panettone with intricate piped white icing, delicate sugar spun flowers and edible purple blossoms. The judges are seriously impressed with all aspects of her loaf, from the bake, to the flavour, and and the attention to detail in the decoration.

*

While Iron Bull's spiced coconut bread sounds relatively simple, he assures the camera that is isn't.

“You've got to get a balance. If it's too sweet it's just going to be a cake, and we're making a bread. So it has to be subtle, and the spices can't overpower it. There's a balance.”

The next time we see the Bull, he's kneading his dough and just flirting outrageously with Dorian.

“This is how the professionals do it,” the Bull says, as he begins to throw his dough in the air and catch it, kneading it that way.

“Oh yes, that seems sensible,” Dorian says, from his bench.

“Don't worry Dorian, I'm great with my hands, I—Aah!”

his dough goes flying, and luckily it's caught by Vivienne, who arches one perfect brow as he sheepishly goes to fetch his escaped dough.

Iron Bull goes all out for the semi final, and the judges are impressed; his coconut loaf has a coconut rum glaze, topped with a delicate spiral of coconut to finish.

“Delicate work for a man with such big hands,” Judge Morrigan appraises.

*

“I'm worried I have chosen something too simple now,” Josephine says of her 'milkshake loaf' trio, a twist on a tradition milk bread, as she measures ingredients. “I know I can do this well, but it's the semi-final, I'm not sure if the judges will think it's too simple.”

“I'm sure that is just semi-final nerves,” Zevran says. “Everyone gets them, starts thinking they can't even bake, why are they here? You're going to be alright.”

Spurred on, Josephine works on her delicately balanced loaves. Her bake might be simple, but balancing all the flavours is a feat. A chocolate milkshake loaf with salted caramel butter, a strawberry milkshake loaf with mint glaze, and a vanilla and cinnamon milkshake loaf all test the very limits of her ability to multi-task and keep time well.

“When you started, you were a bundle of nerves,” Judge Morrigan says, when they come to judge her cakes. “You would fall apart at the slightest pressure. Now you've presented to us three bakes in three hours, and kept your head the entire time. Well done.”

*

Dorian is also undertaking a trio of sweet breads, a mix of straight traditional and variations on Tevinter breads. His bench is laden with spices, which has come to be expected of his bakes.

“I hope I'm not too predictable,” he says. “But Tevinter has such wonderful cuisine, it seems a shame not to share it at any given opportunity.”

“I think you're brave,” Josephine says. “It is not as widely practised as Antivan cooking, people still think of it as niche. You're bringing something new. Maybe Orlais is ready for Tevinter cuisine.”

“Hardly,” he says. “These people can't handle spices.”

His puran poli is a roti filled with a sweet chickpea dal, and he makes bhatura rolls with clementine and cloves, and flat breads with chunks of cardamom fudge through them. The judges are impressed that he was able to undertake so many processes and deliver three quite different breads, and agree that although the fudge bread doesn't really go with the two more savoury breads, individually they are fantastic.

**Technical Challenge: Beetroot and Chocolate Cake**

Vivienne has no trouble with the limited recipe and the strange combination, though she does roll her eyes at the 'trend' of mixing beetroot and chocolate. The judges are very impressed by how well-balanced and moist her cake is.

Though the Iron Bull takes some liberties with decoration – there weren't strict instructions, after all – the judges are largely impressed with his offering, only just ranking it below Vivienne's in the blind judging.

Josephine has a little trouble with the candied beetroot portion, having to throw out two attempts at it before getting it right, which risks throwing her timing off. The judges deem her cakes as a little dry, and not having risen as well as some others.

“I hate this,” Dorian moans. “I really hate this. Putting beetroot in cake is a crime.” Despite his disagreement, he still tries hard with the recipe. The judges think his offering is okay, but not up to the standard the other manage.

**Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Dorian, Josephine, Iron Bull, Vivienne

**Showstopper Challenge: Sweet and Savoury Ice Cream Cake**

“I've practised this several times, to mixed reviews,” Vivienne admits. “It's very hard to get the balance right. I don't know anyone who's made a sponge cake flavoured with red peppers before.”

“Go big or go home, right?” the Bull says.

“Precisely.”

The idea of her olive ice cream doesn't go down well with the judges, but she persevers. Combined with her roasted red pepper sponge, it's an ice cream cake that is a strange combination, that surprises the judges with its executions.

“I want to hate it,” Judge Harding says. “I really don't want to like olive ice cream. The red peppers I get, but the olives, no. It shouldn't work. But it _does_. You must be magic, honestly.”

*

A chocolate cake is traditional enough; a bacon ice cream filling, not. The Iron Bull assures Zevran that he knows what he's doing.

“It's great. I know it sound weird, but you've got to give it a try. Don't go and get all prude on me now!”

Decorated with a maple syrup frosting, salted caramel crumb and iced pink pigs, the Bull's cake looks every inch a delicious chocolate cake – and the ice cream that looks like raspberry ripple at first glance, but is actually more of a bacon ripple, has the judges bemused but impressed.

“I wouldn't eat it again,” Judge Morrigan insists, “but you've shown a great amount of skill, and a knowledge for pushing the limits of flavour combinations that really impresses me, time and again.”

*

“I changed my mind three times when deciding what to make for this challenge. I tried so truly horrible ice creams figuring our what to do.”

“Oh, did you try carrot?” Vivienne asks.

“Yes! Wasn't it just awful?”

“It absolutely was,” Vivienne laughs.

Josephine's tomato and blue cheese ice cream cake is a strange combination in a round of strange combinations. Josephine brings with her a dried powder made from tomatoes that she's made in preparation for her bake, which brings an intense tomato flavour to her bright red cake batter. Her blue cheese ice cream looks inconspicuously like vanilla, except the cheese smell throughout the whole tent as she prepares.

She has some issue with leakage and her cake looks a little messy upon presentation, but the judges are impressed with her flavour balance and the skills that went into the cake especially.

*

“Nobody wanted to kiss me after I tested this bake,” Dorian says of his chocolate and garlic saffron ice cream cake.

“I'd kiss you,” the Bull says, giving a one eyes wink that has Zevran and Isabela cackling.

“You're impossible,” he mutters, grinning as he mixes his chocolate cake mix.

Although Dorian's bake looks stunning, with a mirror-glaze dark chocolate finish and a dusting of saffron, his adventurous use of spices doesn't impress the the judges this time.

“It's too garlicy,” Judge Harding says. “I see where you're going with it, and the roast garlic does have a nice sweetness, but with the saffron it feels a bit confused.”

**Results**

**Star Baker:** Vivienne

“The last star baker award of the season! I consider that quite a feat of achievement. Especially against such good competition. Dorian fought so well, I know he'll go on to great things.”

**Eliminated:** Dorian

“I suppose someone has to go,” he says, smiling. “I would have loved to have stayed until next week, but that would only mean someone else would have gone. Although I'm a fantastic baker, in this instance my companions were better, and perhaps a little more sensible.”

“Has Bake Off had a big impact on your life?” the producer prompts.

“Immeasurably,” Dorian says, quickly getting emotional. His eyes shine, and he is clearly trying not to cry. “It has been the best time of my life.”


	11. Week 11: Final

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remaining Contestants: Vivienne, Iron Bull and Josephine

On _An Extra Slice_ , Dorian is quizzed about his illness. “I only collapsed because I was trying to hold it in on both ends,” he says, to raucous laughter, “they might have eliminated me properly if that had happened!”

**Signature Challenge: Storybook Themed 3 x 6 Mini Pies**

As the tension of the final is hyped by the presenters, the atmosphere in the tent appears to be anything but. The final three contestant laugh easily, and chat to themselves as they wait on judges Harding and Morrigan to give give them their final signature challenge.

They have to have three different kinds of miniature pies, 6 of each. The pies can be sweet or savoury, and must be themed around a book. The judges are looking for ambitious flavours, techniques and a well delivered product.

“So, what story are you telling today?” Judge Morrigan asks, as Vivienne is beginning preparation on her ambitious bakes.

“A collection of stories, in fact,” she says.

“Oh, is that allowed?” Zevran teases.

“The stories told by the Brother Grimm were often not their own creation, but their own retelling, as is the way of folk stories. But they put them to paper, and I trust I'll be forgiven my impertinence.”

“What stories are you basing your pies on?” Judge Morrigan asks.

“Briar Rose – that's a blackberry pie, for the brambles the fair prince has to navigate to reach the sleeping princess. Spiced red apple pies, for Snow White's ill-fated bite from the witch's offering, and a meat pie for Hansel and Gretel.”

“What kind of meat?” Isabela asks. “Not children, I hope!”

Vivienne laughs.

“Veal.”

Her 'bramble maze' pies are decorated with intricate pastry work of branches and thorns, with a blackberry filling. The judges are very impressed by her even bake, and how well formed the decoration on the outside of the pie is, considering a tangle of brambles might have lent itself to being messy. Both judges praise her delicious sweet-sharp flavour.

In homage to Snow White, her spiced 'bitten red apple' pies are styled to look like they have a single bite taken out of them, to suggest the fateful bite Snow White takes. The judges love this attention to detail, and think the spice blend is perfect.

Her 'witch's youngster pies' are square, looking like little cottages with thatched roofs, after the cottage the witch lured Hansel and Gretel to, and filled with rich tender veal. Judge Morrigan is especially taken with the dark humour of the concept, and the judges vote her whole bake a triumph.

*

“We didn't get this story in Par Vollen,” Bull says, speaking to the camera as he prepares his bakes. “The books are restricted, and anything that's all about madness, basically, was never going to fly. So I didn't read _Alice In Wonderland_ until a few years ago. I'm baking for some of my favourite parts of the book – the Queen of Hearts,” Bull glances over towards Vivienne, “the cheshire cat, and the little oysters.”

His 'Queen of Hearts Cherry Pies' are expectedly heart shaped, with a window in the centre so the bright red filling is on display. Both Judges are wowed by his tart-sweet flavours, and the delicate crimping of his pastry hearts.

Shining with an egg-wash glaze, Bull's 'Little Oyster Pies' are nestled together on a 'seafloor' of breadcrumb sand and seaweed. Judge Morrigan is less fond of the fishy flavours than judge Harding, but they're both impressed with his concept and delivery.

Bull's 'Cheshire Cat Mad Pies' each have a pastry tail wrapped around a pie with a perfectly domed top, decorated with swirling light and dark pastry. Inside is a layer of filling made with apple cider vinegar, and on top a mixture of pineapple and cranberry. Both judges are surprised that the strong flavours work together and don't overpower each other, but judge Harding says his vinegar filling is too strong for her liking.

*

“I grew up on these stories,” Josephine says, showing Isabela her long-loved copy of The Wizard of Oz. “The movie's good, but my father would read me the books as a child, and the imagery has stayed with me.”

“Oooh, so are you making a emerald city pie?”

“If we were making a cake, I'd definitely have done an emerald city! But with pies, I'm going more iconic.”

“More iconic than the emerald city?”

“A scarecrow pie, a tin man pie, and a cowardly lion pie.”

Her Scarecrow Country Pies are chicken and summer vegetables pies, with traditional pie thatching and a miniature scarecrow made with a tiny roast pumpkin. The judges like her combination of flavours, and her artful presentation is called 'stunning'.

Shaped like oil cans and with a rich deep brown steak and ale filling, her Tin Man Oil Pies are brushed with an edible metallic glaze to give them a robotic feel, and a decorated with delicate pastry hearts. Although a couple of them have seepage issues because of the rich filling, the judges are both impressed with the effort and result, especially that none of the handles on her oil can pies have broken.

A subtly spiced vegetarian filling is the center of her Cowardly Lion No Hunt Pies, which have pastry manes and are decorated with very intricate lion face designs – each of her six pies has a different facial expression. While judge Morrigan thinks her flavours could have been more daring, she knows she didn't want to be too bold to fit with the 'cowardly' theme, and judge Harding is vvery impressed with how well filled and stable the lion pies are.

**Technical Challenge: Baumkuchen Schichttorte**

“They've certainly given us a challenge worthy of the final. It's an involved process, requiring constant and fast-cooking layers.”

Vivienne wastes no time, preparing the batter for her baumkuchen ready to cook the layers. The contestants have to constantly work on their cake, without taking their attention from it.

It doesn't stop their chatter – all the contestants have become friends over the course of the competition, and with only three of them left, conversation is easy.

A VT about Vivienne and her baking history plays – in it we see Vivienne leading a lecture at a university, baking bread in her kitchen, and spending time with her partner Bastien. Vivienne taught herself to bake as a student at university as a way to cope with the stress of her studies, and found one of her passions.

“She has a profound understanding of how much can be done with baking,” Bastien says. “She is as passionate about cake as teaching, as anything in her life.”

*

Iron Bull is seemingly quite relaxed about the challenge, adding layers to his baumkuchen steadily.

“I've never made it before, but hey, I like a cake that's fun to say.”

“Not quite so fun to make,” Josephine says.

“Hey, I'm the one with giant fingers.”

Bull's VT shows him at work with his construction crew friends, and then Bull getting a split at bowling with them while they whoop and cheer. The Bull discovered the joy of cake after emmigrating south, as his homeland in Par Vollen have very few cultural sweet baking traditions. The VT shows Bull buying macrons for an unspecified sweetheart at his favourite Orlesian patisserie.

“He's a feeder,” Krem, Iron Bull's best friend says. “There's not a problem we can have he doesn't think there's a cake to solve it with.”

*

Josephine is very relaxed as she checked the minimal instructions fore the technical, a complete change to the panic she got into in the first few weeks in the Bake Off tent.

“I've never made this before,” she tells the camera, “but we have a similar layered cake in Antiva. I think I know how to do this.”

The third VT of the program shows Josephine prepping for a case in her law office, baking a cake in her kitchen, and entertaining friends at a dinner party. She came from a family that didn't bake but always enjoyed cake, and has only baked for close friends and family before she came into the competition.

“She's good,” Yvette, Josephine's sister says. “Better than she thinks she is. Baking isn't something she was born into, it's something none of the family really does, so she hasn't had any guidance going in, you know? She's finding it all on her own. If she believed in herself like I believe in her, she could do so much.”

The judging is the closer than it's been all season, and the differences between the bakes are minuscule – some glaze not set properly here, some wonky layers there is all that divides the bakers.

 **Judges rank in order of worst to best:** Iron Bull, Josephine, Vivienne

Before the final challenge, the judges appear to have no clear idea who might win. All three of them are amazing bakers, and there is no clear outlier at this point. It's going to be a tough decision after the final challenge.

**Showstopper Challenge: 3 Tiered Mythical Wedding Cake**

For the very last showstopper of the season, the contestants have four hours in which to make a three tiered wedding cake themed about something mythical.

Vivienne's Lyrium Geode Wedding Cake consists of three layers; chocolate and caramel, vanilla and strawberry and coffee and walnut, with an intricate geode design on the outside made of icing and carved sugar. It's an incredibly labour intensive process, that sees Vivienne focusing entirely on her bake.

“So is lyrium a real thing?” Zevran asks. “I thought it was just, well, a myth!”

“It's a real compound. It was used in early medicine, though it's toxic. Some of the side-effects were interpreted as magic.”

Judges Morrigan and Harding are both impressed with her final bake; the cake looks stunning, and the detailing is breathtaking. They compliment her flavours, and the amazing standard she's achieved throughout the competition.

*

“Used to love dragons as a kid. Still do.”

“Would you have this for your own wedding?” Judge Harding asks.

“Ha. If I ever got married, hopefully the person wouldn't object to a dragon cake.”

Iron Bull's Dragon Treasure Wedding Cake consists of three layers; white chocolate and raspberry, mint chocolate and dark chocolate and orange, decorated with coins, gems and other treasures each individually hand moulded from modelling chocolate, spun sugar and sugar paste. On top of it, and winding partially around it sits a fondant-covered rice crispy moulded dragon.

The judges are astonished that he managed to get his decoration done in the time, with so many components to individually shape. The flavour combinations are classic, and impress them. His willingness to experiment and try daring flavour combinations is highly praised.

*

Drawing on the stories of her homeland Antiva, Josephine's Siren Wedding Cake consists of a chocolate and cherry bottom tier, a honey and rose middle tier, and a traditional Antivan fruit cake top tier. It is covered in a mixture of shimmering fondant icing and glassy sugar work, giving the effect of water. A completely edible ship made of biscuit and chocolate sits on the top of the cake, with delicate mermaid designs painted and moulded around the tiers of the cake.

“This is tame, for a wedding cake.”

“Is it?” Isabela laughs.

“Antivan weddings cakes, for any wedding worth talking about, are five tiers, at least.”

The judges are highly complimentary of Josephine's bakes, and of the look and design of the cake. Where something like this would have once made her fall to pieces, she has grown as a baker so much, and now handles things with confidence and enthusiasm.

**Results**

**Winner:** As is traditional of the Bake Off, the contestants, judges and presenters head outside to where the previous contestants, family and friends are gathered for the announcement of the result of the competition.

Isabela gathers the crowd's attention.

“Since Zevran got to announce the winner last year, I get to do the honours this time. The competition has been amazing, and all three of these bakers have produced the most amazing cakes we've seen. So without further ado, the winner of the Great Skyhold Bake Off is...”

The pause, a TV-staple, drags on, as the camera cuts between the three anxious contestants.

“Josephine.”

Josephine's hands fly to her face as the crowd cheers and claps. The music swells as Josephine is handed the trophy and a huge bunch of flowers, and people rush in to congratulate and commiserate.

Cassandra picks Josephine clean off the ground when Josephine throws her arms around her neck. Leliana hugs her tightly to her.

“Well done,” the cameras pick up Vivienne saying, as she leans in to kiss Josephine's cheek. “Well deserved, darling. We couldn't have lost to better.”

“I'm amazed,” Josephine says, teary-eyed when they finally get her to do a final piece to camera. “I can't believe I won. I never thought I could get past the first week or two after how I started. I didn't know I could do this. I didn't know that I had that in me. But I do. I'm good, and I'm going to get better and better.”

*

As with previous series of the shoe, before the final credits roll, a slideshow rolls to show what our bakers have done in the months since filming the Bake Off and leaving the tent behind them.

Blackwall has taken a break from baking to focus on his family and to welcome his first grandchild.

Cullen has taken his baking to help veterans readjust to life and combat PTSD, like it helped him.

Cole volunteers with vulnerable children and adults, teaching them to bake and raising money for charity.

Leliana has baked several cakes to order for the Arishok of Par Vollen, and the Empress of Orlais.

Cassandra still bakes, though she is very busy planning for her wedding.

Varric has a book about his time in the Bake Off tent coming out. He still only bakes for fun.

Solas is busy with other projects alongside his baking.

Sera has started a cookie subscription box business, sending out new flavours each month, offering employment opportunities to young adults coming out of care.

Dorian has returned to university to pursue his Masters, and mainly bakes at home with his boyfriend.

Iron Bull has started his own bakery and catering company, which he runs with his best friend, and partner.

Vivienne still loves to teach her students, but has also started hosting her own private baking classes, and appears as a regular quest chef on popular cookery programs.

Josephine is touring food festivals and events while writing a cookbook, and also getting married to Cassandra.


	12. Epilogue: Where Are They Now?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What's been happening to the contestants since the Bake Off finished?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who read and enjoyed this fic, I hope you'll enjoy this little treat :)

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Details/higher res images [here!](http://imgur.com/a/0UMNE)


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